It’s always tricky thinking about gifts when it comes to wedding planning. Now it’s 2016 and, as more and more couples are already living together pre-marriage, a lot of the gifts on the list are things you already have. If you’re in this position, it’s unlikely you want to register for gifts just for the sake of registering. More likely, you want to put the intentions towards something you can get the most out of, like a honeymoon. What is the bridal etiquette involved here? Is it more complicated? Let’s get into the nitty-gritty of this modern controversy.
Pro: stress is taken out of the honeymoon
What with budgeting for your wedding, people often forget about the stress of planning a honeymoon. You need to set aside money for that too! But if you decide to go for a ‘honeyfund’, a lot of that stress is taken away. Then, it just becomes planning a vacation, which is a lot of fun.
Photo credit: The Knot
Con: it’s tacky
This view is shared by a lot of people. Even if not by you, maybe your guests will be a little put off by the idea. You’re basically just asking for money. While it’s true that a buying gifts equates to the same thing, some people think there is a pretty clear distinction. Do you?
Pro: it’s about experiences, not things, right?
This is a modern mantra aimed towards happiness and equality, and in this case rings true. If you feel more joy celebrating a fantastic experience trekking the jungles of Thailand, or admiring the architecture of Europe than collecting furniture for your house, then that’s what matters. It’s your wedding, and it’s about what you want.
Photo credit: Loving the Bike
Con: people want to choose
Whether you are opting for a bridal registry or honeyfund, people often prefer and appreciate the option to choose. Telling people to give you money, or even a particular gift can seem a little prescriptive. Maybe your guests have a particular gift in mind they know you’d love, and you telling them you don’t want it may be hurtful.
Pro: you can spend it on what YOU want
Did you know that in South Korea, it is customary to always give the newlywed couple money as a congratulations? This acts as the couple’s first step of freedom in their lives together, and it can for you, too. Maybe material gifts aren’t your thing, or maybe you don’t want the hassle of having to return anything. Either way, having the freedom of choice in a wedding gift is priceless.
Photo credit: My Seoul Searching
Con: it’s not traditional
This is a biggie for some people. If your wedding is steeped in tradition because that’s the way you like it, then you maybe want to keep the bridal registry in keeping with that. For a lot of families, tradition is a major factor.
We are moving toward a more modern celebration of weddings, but it’s a slow transgression. If you still can’t quite decide between a traditional bridal registry and honeyfund, then strike a balance between the two. Give people an option of what to gift you. You can even register with a travel agent and include a travel voucher option. But the bottom line is it’s your wedding, your day, and your choice.
Photo banner credit: Phuket Photography Thailand